breathe in... breathe out

 Breathe In...
       SAHMs vs. Working mothers. It is an age-old argument that never gets settled. I, myself, am lucky to be a stay at home momma. My husband is an amazing man and father who works really hard so that I can stay home. I think working mothers are wonderful too. It's a personal choice. Simple as that.
      For a little bit of background, I didn't always aspire to be a stay at home mom, and I don't always plan on staying home. Let's see... I met my Marine husband when I was a JUNIOR in college. Major selected and almost accomplished. In fact, I transferred from James Madison University to Virginia Commonwealth University to enter a better Criminal Justice program. I actually met my husband the summer before I started my first semester at VCU. I thought I would graduate and start my career. I actually believed that even after Adam and I were married and living in NC. The funny thing about the military is that you have no say in your life events. Well, you have some say ;) but you cannot control where you go! After I moved to NC, I started my journey to become an Alcohol Law Enforcement Agent. (yay, right!?) The exact day I was driving to VA to get my documents ready, Adam called to inform me that he had been flagged for recruiting. RECRUITING DUTY.. What The F***. This meant that we would be moving.. ANYWHERE in the country. So much for that idea! So, I got a job at GNC and worked there until we moved. I didn't want to be a stay at home wife. Well, with the fact that we would be moving around... a lot, and the fact that we did want children, we decided I would stay at home for a while. It was very hard for me to face the reality that it might be a while before I can really jump start my career, but once I came to terms with that, I have been happy ever since! I want to be home with my children, and Adam is okay with that. His job is very demanding, meaning his days are usually about 15 hours long, and he works at least 6 days a week.
      What I'm getting at here, is that I have my Bachelor's Degree, but my husband and I choose to have me stay home. I love it. I get up with my child in the morning, I put him down for naps during the day and bedtime every night. I get to teach him new things, and I'm there watching him grow and learn. No, my husband doesn't make a million, but we don't "want." We have made sacrifices, but they are sacrifices we are willing to make over and over again so that we can live this life, and so that I can be here at home with my child every day. I read a comment that one naive woman made about how "it pisses her off when stay at home moms are lazy, don't clean all day, and don't have warm delicious meals made for their husbands at night." Let me just clarify a few things... first of all, when you drop your child off at daycare or the babysitter, do you expect them to clean all day or tend to your child? Now, don't get me wrong, my house is clean and I do constantly pick up and clean, but my main concern is my child. If I don't get around to the huge mounds of laundry staring me in the face, but my child is giggling and happy, I feel like I have accomplished all I've wanted to accomplish that day. There are some days when I can get a lot done around the house, but there are other days when Connor really wants my attention, and you can bet your bottom dollar that he comes first. Always. I know I'm lucky, because my husband never comes home and complains that the floors are sticky, there's baby vomit in my hair, or his white teeshirts and underwear haven't been cleaned in days. He smiles and gives Me, Connor, and even Lilly (our dog) smooches. The warm dinner deal, okay, I try. Like I said earlier though, my husband works long days, and most of the time he eats late lunches. And IF he even eats what I make, it has long been cold by the time he gets to it. Again, he doesn't complain. Just because a stay at home mom's house isn't designer beautiful and merry maid clean doesn't mean she's lazy. It simply means she is busy. Doing what? Taking care of her child. If you work, that's awesome too. If I could find a job that would be "worth" it and I didn't live the military lifestyle with my husband gone a lot and us always moving, then I would probably work too. I really applaud working mothers, and I know they miss their babies when at work. Like I said, I feel lucky because I get to do what I want to do. As long as you are doing what you want, and you, your child and family are happy, then you are doing the right thing.
Breathe out...