39 weeks.

   Tomorrow is the big day. I wasn't going to post until Austin arrived, but I figured I would write about the anticipation I feel. The flood of emotions I feel right now are excited, nervous, scared, calm, happy, and relieved. Mostly, I have a sense of peace about it. Of course, in the back of my mind I think about last time, but I'm definitely not focusing on the negative. I'm not thinking about the recovery and the guilt I feel leaving Connor. Instead, I'm thinking about the fact that tomorrow we will become a family of 4 after a healthy pregnancy. I'm thinking about Connor gaining a baby brother, and while he might not be ecstatic about it at first, I know he is going to love his brother. I read that a sibling is the best thing you can give your child, and I do believe that. I have the best times with my sisters, and I know my boys are going to have a blast. I cannot wait for that. I am focusing on the fact that this time, I hope I automatically get skin to skin contact and can breastfeed within an hour of delivery. Right now, I am sitting here watching Austin wiggle around in my tummy, and it is so strange to know that tomorrow he will be in my arms instead. I am SO excited! I wonder what he will look like, how big he is going to be, and I can't wait to see my husband love on his new son.

   I thought that the night before my C-section I would be freaking out, but like I said, I feel really calm about it. God is in control, and that is a really peaceful feeling :) And let's be honest, I'm ready to NOT be pregnant anymore. While I really enjoy feeling him move around, these last few weeks have been rough. From back pain, to exhaustion, to just being gigantic.. I'm done. He's done cooking, and it's time he gets in my arms :) I will post pics on here and facebook as soon as I am settled with my little family!! Prayers are greatly appreciated. Love to you all!