Quality over Quantity

     The past two years of my life have been a whirlwind. I graduated College, moved to NC, got married to a Marine & love of my life, got pregnant, moved to Texas, and had my sweet Connor. Phew! It's hard for me to keep up with myself, so I am so, very grateful for my friends who have stuck by me through the major changes in my life. If I have learned anything about friendships in the course of those crazy two years, it is that quality trumps quantity. I have lost "friends," but with that, I have grown so close to my true friends. No matter what I call to talk about, whether I call to catch up or whine, they are there. My best friends are all over the place. Richmond, VA Beach, and even Germany. But, it doesn't matter because our friendships work both ways. I call them, they call me, and if we go over a week without talking, we don't get mad. We Understand. I was walking with my friend and neighbor last night, and we were talking about this. She said, "some friends are only meant to be in our lives for a season..." That made me think. Then why is it SO hard to let go? We try so hard to hold on to a piece of our past that doesn't want to be a part of our present and future. Recently, I finally let go of that, and I felt like a huge weight had been lifted off of my heart. It hurt to let go, but friendships shouldn't have to be forced. Just like any relationship, forcing a friendship only makes you miserable. Some people grow a part, and if only one person is trying to make the friendship last, it is going to turn toxic. I am absolutely fine with having a handful of close friends, and I know that these friends would drop everything at a moment I needed them, and they would be there for me. Once I accepted that letting go can be GOOD and not always bad, my life was instantly better. I am happier because I have friends and family who lift me up instead of pull me down. I am going home with Connor Monday, and I cannot wait to see family and friends! I am so blessed..

The ants go marching one by one..

     Hoorah! Connor is walking big time.. or marching, if you will :) I love watching his little booty walk across the floor.

Connor has been strickly on sippy cups and off bottles for a month now, He waves and says hey and byebye (when he wants), and he is OBSESSED with his "dada." He's also been sleeping 12 hours 7-7 at night, and still on 2 (1 hour each) naps a day. He's happy, healthy, 23 lbs 9 oz, and my perfect baby boy!

Cloth diaper article.. worth the read!

      I just read an article that made my skin crawl, and with my freakish :) obsession with cloth diapers, I will no longer feel guilty about purchasing an adorable cloth diaper. Knowledge is power people...

http://www.smallfootprintfamily.com/dangers-of-disposable-diapers

All I can say after reading this article is that I am a proud cloth diapering Momma!

11 months old

      One more month until Connor is ONE... ONE!!!  I'm having a harder time than I thought I would. Mostly because the day before he turned 11 months, (Sunday), he just took off walking. He's been taking steps, but he was still soo wobbly. Then, on Sunday, he walked across the room. I waited for him to fall but he maintained his balance. He started to crawl again, so I figured it was a fluke? Then tonight he kept walking. He would walk instead of crawl long and then even longer distances before tumbling over. Adam and I both cried on Sunday because he is growing so fast. It really shocked us. Babies learn so quickly, and we know once he started walking it was allll over from there! Also, last Friday, as Adam was leaving for work he kissed Connor bye and Connor waved and said "byeee byee." Adam tried to lean in for one more kiss and Connor shoved him away and said "BYE!" haha He has been repeating so much back to me, and he's so smart. He amazes me. He's almost one year old, and the March of Dimes walk is April 29 in Houston. 3 days after his first birthday. That is very dear to my heart. I cannot believe that almost a year ago, I was in the hospital with him. I can't even begin to explain the heartbreak as I watched my newborn baby struggle to breathe and eat. I am walking in the March for Babies, and if anyone wants to donate ANY amount, it would be greatly appreciated. I didn't set a very high goal, but I'd love to surpass my goal of $100. I am so grateful for the NICU nurses and March of Dimes for providing the necessary care that my preemie baby needed. Because of them, Connor is here today a healthy, extremely happy, and beautiful TODDLER! Here is the link to my page:

http://www.marchforbabies.org/personal_page.asp?pp=4352720&ct=4&w=5530567&u=lhill630


     Kristen, my sister, came to visit last Thursday through Monday. Connor LOVES Aunt Kristen. It was sooo nice to have a piece of home and a piece of my heart here in Texas. I miss my family and friends so, very much! We went to the beach, and Connor had a blast! We also had a girls night while Daddy took care of Connor and put him to bed. It was much needed and so relaxing. We ended up seeing Hunger games, and I had a few Coronaritas. Delish! I was sad to see her go, but I will be in VA in a little over 2 weeks! Here are some pics of what we've been up to!

The hardest part was finding you b,ut once I did...I knew

       It's been awhile since I've posted! Things have been crazy hectic 'round here, and Adam has been working his butt off. Which means, I have been playing Mommy and Daddy, leaving me little time to do anything, much less blog. That's my excuse & I'm sticking to it...

     Yesterday was my and Adam's wedding anniversary. We plan to celebrate whichever one Adam is home for, either Jan. 14 or Mar. 20, and if he's here for both then we do little celebrations both days. We'll make up for the years we don't get to celebrate any.. like last year. Adam managed to be gone for both anniversaries. Jan. 14 is the day we actually got our marriage certificate, but Mar. 20 was so special because we got to celebrate with our family and friends. I figured we would just drink wine and watch our wedding video. Well, Adam got off work relatively early, picked up chinese food and wine and came home. I was surprised when I went to get my food.. there was a little box. I looove little boxes! He went and got me a beautiful necklace! Connor's birthstone is a diamond, and this necklace is very simple white gold with a single diamond in it. I love it! He is so thoughtful, and is freakishly good at picking out jewelry for me. The night was so great. We watched our wedding video, and laughed and talked about everything. Connor woke up in the middle of it, so we brought him in the living room and can't believe how far we've come. We also watched our whole ceremony, and I have to say that I didn't "get it" on our wedding day. The preacher was talking, and all I heard was "womp womp" because I was so nervous and smitten by my handsome husband. But, last night, Adam and I really listened... Two years in, and it makes so much sense. We have certainly been through a lot, but I am so very lucky to have found such an amazing man. Listening to the preacher, took me back to every silly fight and how truly silly they were. Then, I thought about the day I had Connor. Adam was by my side the entire time. Through sickness and in health took on a whole new meaning. Our marriage is hard. We are constantly struggling to find time for one another. The Marine Corps, recruiting duty, and a baby on top of that. Last night was much needed. We laughed like we hadn't laughed in a long time, and I was reminded why I do what I do as a Marine Wife. It's tough, but I wouldn't have it any other way. I'm so blessed.

Trials and Tribulations

      When it comes to being a mommy, we all have our weak moments. Every stage brings new challenges, and just when you think you have your baby all figured out, they change their ways; whether it's nap time (CONNOR), transitioning to solid foods, teething, learning how to crawl, walk, or talk back! We got off track with Connor's naps and bedtime schedule last week, and it has been miserable getting him back on track. It doesn't help that he's getting older, so I'm trying to adjust his naps and bedtime according to how much sleep he needs. He just isn't tired or fussy at bedtime. Usually, I can say, "well, he's really fussy so I know he's exhausted." But, he isn't even fussy. He's hyper! This kid jumps up and down in his bed so much that the springs are squeaking now! So frustrating (but hilarious at the same time, lol). This week has been an experiment for me. I tried the 1 nap a day thing on Monday, and it worked well. He slept from 11-1 and went to bed at 7. Tuesday, it didn't work. So, yesterday we went back to 2 naps and it worked well, but he went to bed at 8. I guess I just have to let him push bedtime back to 8, until he is able to make it through the day with 1 nap. I've started watching a little 3 year old girl at nights for a few hours, and she is usually here past 8, so bedtime is a challenge, but Connor is almost always asleep by 8.
     That has been our challenge, but as I've been talking to other mommas who have asked me for advice about their newborns, I have been thinking back to when Connor was a newborn. I can remember rocking him at night and him screaming... and I would just cry. Connor had acid reflux, and he also had a really sensitive tummy. All around, he was just a fussy newborn, but as each month passed, he seemed to get better. But, as he got better with his reflux and tummy issues, we faced new challenges. Our main problem was forming a schedule. If I could go back, I would have gotten him on a strict schedule from the beginning. I swear it does wonders! But, my point is that you are going to be faced with challenges at every stage, heck every day is a challenge in my house! Pray for patience, and know that it is okay to feel defeated, exhausted, and weak. It's okay to cry. Cry, take a deep breath, and continue to be the amazing mother that you are. You wouldn't be a great mom without trials and tribulations, but when you overcome them, I promise you that it is worth it. I look at Connor, and I vaguely remember the times when I would cry because he wouldn't stop crying, but I do completely remember the first smiles, coos, and giggles. So, to all you brand new mommas out there, you will make it through this stage, and it just keeps getting better and better.

I don't strive to be a hero... I strive to be a great mom.

       Friday, my neighbor asked me if I work out. "Uhh, why? I asked", thinking "Crap, she can totally tell that I most definitely have not been to the gym in 2 months." She told me I look buff! So, in my world "weight lifting" consists of juggling a 25 lb baby all day and "cardio" consists of chasing that 25 lb baby around all.day.long... and then eating (whatever takes 5 minutes to make) over the kitchen sink. And I do go for afternoon walks often. Yes, yes I do work out! Okay, I admit that I tell myself that to make me feel better about that gym membership that doesn't get used enough. I know there are moms who do what I do and also go to the gym every day, but guess what.. I do not, and I don't beat myself up about it.. too much. I get on gym kicks, and then Connor gets sick (I decided it was from the gym daycare) and then I don't go for 2 months. Kudos to moms who go to the gym, and still manage to do everything they need to do around the house and for their family. I envy them. I'm just not one of them. I plan on starting my gym kick back up next week, but we will see how it goes. For now, I'm perfectly content drinking my coffee in the morning, using my baby as a weight and cardio machine, drinking wine at night, and cheating on my diet when I've had a long day. After all, I don't strive to be a hero... I strive to be a great mom.